My friend said she had an identity crisis this summer when she realized how many pairs of pants she had come to own.
Our other friend judged her crisis to equal the ridiculousness of my own.
I beg to differ.
Monday: In Linguistics, we are now learning about phonology, and thus are using the International Phonetic Alphabet (IPA) to transcribe words and the individual sounds used to create them. Check it: shoe is represented by /ʃu/, for example. And /ʃ/ is a voiceless post-alveolar fricative, whereas /u/ is a high back rounded tense vowel. Anyway, in transcribing, you use your own pronunciation. Here’s where I encounter a problem. I pronounce a lot of things differently than the majority of people. No, I’m not from a foreign country. Yes, English is my first language. No, I’m not from the East Coast, of the South, or the Midwest. Yes, I’m from the Pacific Northwest, which is generally not thought of as having an accent. I say “melk” and “vanella.” I slightly mix and interchange my vowels on “pin” and “pen,” so for me, the two words sound the same. When I say “winning on Wednesday,” the beginnings of those words sounds the same. I have a list in my phone of all my “word problems” my friends have pointed out to me. Thing is, phonemic transcriptions made me realize I have so many more of them. So, what is right? Should I try and adjust my pronunciations to fit with the norm? Will I then be more easily understood?—first part of my identity crisis.
Tuesday: I convince my friend to trudge up to Scripps with me to attend a performance called “Going Green the Wong Way” by a woman named Kristina Wong. Facebook tells me she “was named ‘One of the Seven Funniest Eco-Comedians’ by Mother Nature Network.” I would agree. She was hilarious. She did a solo performance beginning with a slideshow of her misadventures of owning a pink Mercedes-Benz named “Harold” that ran on vegetable oil and eventually burst into flames at the end of a freeway exit ramp. Then she broke into more of an acting performance instead of a slideshow, which took the audience aback a little bit at first as she demonstrated being an 11-year-old environmental tyrant in middle school, then a junior in high school working the summer for CALPIRG, then a “SEXXXXAAAAY” diva who focused on having an environmentally friendly menstrual cycle. In the end, she came back to another slideshow about the public transportation system in LA, because she’s lived there for the last 4 years without a car. Why did this contribute to my identity crisis? Because she made me think about things, and I made myself feel guilty. She didn’t guilt me at all, I did that to myself. I claim to care about the environment, but I own and drive a not-that-fuel-efficient car and eat not-very-energy-efficient meat. I was sitting there, applauding Kristina Wong’s performance, thinking that maybe I should become a vegetarian. Guess what? I haven’t eaten meat since then. We’ll see how this goes.
Wednesday: I was studying for a Computer Science midterm, and then decided to head back to my suite. My friend and I found 3 of our other friends awake at 1 am, animatedly discussing/arguing hook-up culture, pressures, sexual assault, among other topics. We became enveloped in this discussion for the next two hours. It all stemmed from one of my friend’s making a comment about how, at a party, he could tell a girl “wanted it.” This led us to analyze the ability to read social cues, what you should do with that information, and how it’s disrespectful to presume to know what any other human being is thinking. My head was buzzing with more comments and questions, but at 3 a.m., we decided it was time to sleep. You know, CS midterm….
Thursday: I attended a talk called “Faith and First Times” put on by the Pomona Student Union (PSU). It involved Lena Chen, a Harvard Alum who garnered attention for her blog “Sex and the Ivy,” which involved her observation that Harvard is the place “where fun and sex go to die;” a Muslim woman and Pomona alum, Nura Maznavi; and Mary Poplin, a late Christian convert who is a professor at Claremont Graduate University. The topic up for discussion was, essentially, “virginity.” But, as discussed, it is a social construct and defined very differently from person to person. I considered the following to be one of the most poignant points made: “what you see represented in our culture is not exactly what’s happening in people’s bedrooms or in people’s minds.” Identity crisis? I don’t know how I define these things, and agree that people should be more comfortable in discussing such topics without fearing judgement.
Friday: I just want to have so many discussions. I have numerous ideas jumping about my head, clamoring for attention. Hopefully I can take some time out of diligently working this weekend to think about them and reach some conclusions. Oh, and I’ll keep you updated on how the vegetarian thing is going.