Why the World Should Be Run by Professors

Out of sheer PSSD (post-swim-season disorder), I find myself with a few extra minutes of free time and energy to appreciate the non-water-related things in life. Today, this just so happens to be Claremont professors.

First of all, I still cannot help but feel an amalgam of giddiness and grandeur as I turn towards one of my teachers and address them as “Professor”. I feel like I should be strutting through a corridor at Hogwarts giving a dignified nod and hello to Professor McGonagall. I’ve even caught myself sneaking in a British accent reminiscent of Harry Potter calling out “Professor!” So whenever a professor tells the class to call them by their first name, I think mmmmm…. nahhhhh. Your name is Professor.

dumbledore welp

Second, I’ve been convinced as of late that if this lovely little world had to be overthrown by some hoard of overlords, I wouldn’t be surprised (or mind) if they were my professors. And here’s why:

1. One of my professor’s academic philosophies is to study things that you can make interesting at a party. If you think about it, the underlying concepts behind this is that A) you know the material so well that you can casually whip it out whenever you feel like it, and B) you are so creative and ingenious that you can convince people to listen to you talk about supply and demand at a party. That sounds awfully equivalent to hypnotism, and that’s bloody brilliant.


2. My CS professor puts Calvin and Hobbes comic strips and various Princess Bride quotes in his lecture power points. INCONCEIVABLE.

3. My old chemistry lab professor would have world leaders at her fingertips. She’s so sociable, friendly, and loved by her students (we have a Facebook group for planning lunches together) and fellow faculty members that I’m positive she would be the overlord with all the connections (mafias bringing her pies, assassins stopping by the lab for tea, the usual).

amy p shrug

4. Our professors realize how much more there is to education than just school. I recall a student obsessing over a test grade in class and my Intro into Digital Media Studies professor turning towards him with a stern look, saying something along the lines of: “If you all are more interested in grades than learning, then that is just sad.” Which brings me to…

5. Tough love! Our professors are great, but that doesn’t mean they let up on us in class. I go to Macroeconomic Theory every Monday and Wednesday absolutely terrified that my professor will cold call on me (as he does with everyone). Does he make macro theory remarkably interesting? Yes. Am I completely overwhelmed/confused/intimidated by his class? Also yes – but I am still excited for the challenge.

6. Our small classes allow us to get close to a lot of faculty members. For example, though they do not qualify as professors, per say, I can imagine the entire swim and dive team bowing down to our lovable assistant coaches Brendan and Sarah as a thank you for their incredible work.

clappping prof

In summary, (and I do apologize for the overwhelming amount of cheesiness throughout this post), the professors here are truly challenging, intelligent, creative, and all-around wonderful sources of education. And they are probably going to take over the world soon.

ben wyatt 2